You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline - it helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer. -Frank Zappa
He was a wise man who invented beer. -Plato
A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her. -- W.C. Fields
Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink. - Lady Astor to Winston Churchill Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it. -His reply
If God had intended us to drink beer, He would have given us stomachs. -David Daye
When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading. - Henny Youngman
Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. - Benjamin Franklin
If you ever reach total enlightenment while drinking beer, I bet it makes beer shoot out your nose. - Deep Thought, Jack Hand
Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza. - Dave Barry
Why is American beer served cold? So you can tell it from urine. - David Moulton
People who drink light "beer" don't like the taste of it they just like to pee a lot. - Capital Brewery, Middleton, WI
Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Kaiser Wilhelm
I would kill everyone in this room for a drop of sweet beer. - Homer Simpson
Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry
I drink to make other people interesting. - George Jean Nathan
They who drink beer will think beer. - Washington Irving
An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools. - For Whom the Bell Tolls - Ernest Hemmingway
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